Java chat issues in Safari

Hello everyone,
I've been a Mac person for a long time, and my whole life runs through an apple product of some kind, and while I was an apple sales rep for awhile, I'm not the most tech guy on the back end. Here's what's happened. I convinced my mother in Canada that she needed to get a mac, as she was having a **** of a time with her PC. After years of sitting on the fence, she jumped in with a mac mini and I was so proud. Trouble is, she hates it.
A very big part of what she uses the computer for is online chatting in her support groups, they all use Java, and she tells me that what's happening is that she won't see a message for a few minutes and then a hundred of them will stream in all at once. These lags or delays can't be a result of the connection, as when I was there in summer her bandwidth was huge, there is clearly just some issue with Java's chat and safari. I tried to get her to use Firefox and she says it was better, but is having the same problem.
She's frustrated to the point where she's talking about pulling the PC out of the Ewaste pile in the garage and hooking it back up.

I mean how hard can it be to get a 62 year old women on a chat page?

I'm in australia, and she's back in canada, but I can get any info anyone might need. These groups are support groups for parents who have lost children, her having lost my little brother at 19 only 3 years ago. They're very important to her, and I'd really appreicate if someone could help me get them back for her.

Thank you

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